Divorce is an emotionally charged process, and in many cases, it can be contentious. However, it does not have to be if the parties are committed to making it easier for everyone.
Divorce, by its very nature, is likely to have unpleasant aspects. Know that your attorney can help you, advise you and provide resources during this difficult time.
In addition, there are things you can do yourself to do your part in keeping things calm between you and the other party. For example:
Communicate openly and honestly
Divorce does not have to be a war. If done well, it can be more of a transactional process where the parties, aided by their attorneys, reach solutions and agreements with minimal conflict.
Make sure you speak with your attorney before you divulge things to the other side, but if your attorney approves, communicate openly and honestly with the other party about how you feel and what you would like to accomplish.
Establish healthy boundaries
When separating two lives, knowing where the line is between you and the other person may be challenging. The process of divorce is a time when you can learn what boundaries are and how to establish healthy boundaries.
For example, you can let the other party know how and when you prefer to communicate and stick to those boundaries. Likewise, when the other party establishes boundaries, you should respect them too.
Consider mediation
Mediation is a highly effective way of solving problems. In divorce, having a neutral third party and your attorneys can be extremely helpful and make the process easier, shorter and less costly.
Going to court can be challenging and adversarial. Communicating to the other side that you are willing to mediate your issues lets them know you want to approach this carefully and collaboratively.
Practice self-care
Most people going through divorce often forget to take care of themselves. You must prioritize caring for your physical, mental and emotional health by doing good things for yourself.
Implementing strategies to have a civil divorce is something you can do to make it easier on yourself and to show the other party how you want to approach the divorce process. If you set the tone early on and show your soon-to-be former spouse that you are willing to work together and collaborate, there is a much higher chance they will follow suit.