Most people are not keen toward the idea of going to court to haggle over issues like child custody, property division or spousal support. A courtroom is a public place, and it’s understandable that you’d want to keep your family matters as private as possible. Do you know that there are alternative dispute resolution options available, such as mediation, that enable you to settle a divorce without stepping foot inside a courtroom?
Mediation is a dispute resolution process that takes place in a private setting. If you choose this option to settle a divorce, then you and your spouse must agree to meet for discussion sessions (however many are necessary) to resolve your differences and create terms of agreement. You must agree to avoid confrontation and to try to resolve all legal matters concerning your divorce without litigation.
Tips to keep in mind for mediation in a divorce
The following list includes helpful tips that are useful in the mediation process:
- Avoid coming across as an adversary — show impartiality instead.
- Be prepared and organized with documentation relevant to discussions.
- Willingness to compromise and cooperate is the key to success.
- Exercise patience in listening.
- Use respectful, calm tones when speaking.
- Take breaks, especially if a specific issue is causing stress.
Mediation is especially effective for parents who want to divorce. These tips can help you avoid arguments. With your children’s best interests in mind, you and your ex can negotiate a fair and agreeable settlement.
Who attends mediation sessions with you?
When you choose to mediate a divorce, there are usually other people in the room when you and your ex meet to discuss property division, child custody and other issues. For example, there is typically a neutral party who agrees to serve as mediator. This person’s job is to facilitate discussion and help you and your ex stay on track and avoid conflict.
You may ask an attorney to attend sessions with you, to provide support and recommendations as needed. This is not a requirement, but it is a wise decision. Also, if you’re dealing with a complex child custody issue, a child psychologist or counselor may attend sessions to provide insight.
How long should mediation sessions take?
Mediation enables you and your ex to make your own decisions regarding issues that are relevant to your divorce. You may also agree ahead of time as to how long each session should last or how many sessions you will schedule. You can set an expiration date, as well. If you have been unable to agree to a settlement by that date, then you may decide to litigate your divorce instead.